Yadda, yadda, yahoo

So, all these months later I start on Monday doing what I was hired to do… daily program presentation and individual counseling. These have been interesting times (since July) building relationships for the centre with the area’s 12 Step groups and their service arms. Personally it has been advantageous getting re-acquainted with lots of folks I hadn’t seen in a long time, plus meeting lots of newcomers to the program who have arrived in the interim. Plus, PLUS, I’ll be able to participate at my home group on a regular basis and actually contribute after a long hiatus and very spotty attendance. Woot-woot!

Here at the centre we’re pleased with how everything is shaping up organization-wise and program content. We’re having major successes with some complex cases; poly-substance and major mental illness mixes. As for staff… heh, heh… we try to put principles before personalities and work toward the common good of our clients.

While those things are all good and fine what it really boils down to NOW is being able to get into a solid routine with Lynda on the homefront. She has been very patient and abiding as this is a new start-up business but she could use some quality one on one time…. and I’m looking forward to that too. I miss my honey.

Although it is still months away I find I’m looking forward to celebrating 10 years clean and sober…. and thinking about all the people who have contributed to my sobriety; both inside and outside the ‘rooms’. As for outside; some of those folks are right here online. Others, people I attended college with when I studied for my Addictions diploma. Still others are close family and friends who have leant their support during trying times.

During this period of re-adjustment I’ll be trying to catch up on some much needed rest and establish a good working structure for mind, body and spirit. That and take time to count my blessings. I’m a happy guy. Ciao for now.

Be The Light….

… which serves to illuminate for others.

Time rushes by with little time for self reflection. Lynda and I have a couple of hours a day through the week when she has done her workday, and prior to me leaving the house for mine. We cook together or alternate and enjoy the meal and catch-up time. Weekends I work days so I’m back for dinner and the evening. Tomorrow night we’re planning an evening around the firepit, possibly with our next door neighbours. Chillin’ on a chilly evening bundled up next to a nice blaze.

I think I’m up around 35 days without a day off…. some days I’m exhausted and don’t know how I’ll cope with our clients. (They can be a pretty demanding bunch.) But then the energy reserve kicks in and cope I do. It really is all about them while they are in our care. Five months in and we’re pleased with how things are going… good success rate; a few slips or relapses. I’m assured by my manager that I will be working a straight day shift gig within a couple of weeks. Just checked the sobriety calculator and this alky is 3,407 consecutive days clean and sober. Working with new people seeking recovery helps keep me that way.

Lynda’s youngest son has closed his chip truck for the season and moved back in with us a couple of months ago so that is a bit of a blessing. Less running around getting his supplies and other errands. He has just hooked up with a g’friend for the first time in years so that ought to keep him occupied. 😉

I plan to revamp this page soon and get rid of some dead links; get back into the swing and renew contact with some folks. I’ve been occupied on Facebook and once in a while post on Twitter. Making a few new & cool friends there. Will try to spend more time here soon. Ciao for now.

Wordle Fun

Rummaging through old posts earlier on today and came across a Wordle I had done in response to an ‘Art Attack’ challenge from old blog buddy and friend Kel, back in October of ’09.

Here’s the original link: http://www.wordle.net/show/wrdl/1191038/norm54blog

So, I went back to the site and it randomly selected words from blog posts and generated a new version (which I am hoping will be viewable here):

<a href=”http://www.wordle.net/show/wrdl/5277379/norm54_2&#8243;           title=”Wordle: norm54_2″><img           src=”http://www.wordle.net/thumb/wrdl/5277379/norm54_2&#8243;           alt=”Wordle: norm54_2″           style=”padding:4px;border:1px solid #ddd”></a>

or here: http://www.wordle.net/show/wrdl/5277379/norm54_2

That’s it for today….. work to do.

 

A Little Skywatch Friday

Now I haven’t contributed here for a long, long time so I’ve refreshed myself with the hows, the whys, and the rules. This post goes out to my blogbuddy Kel at xfacta to whose gentle proddings I have succumbed. She’s a good lady. (oh, … and BTW, my most viewed post ever was one for Skywatch … let’s go for a record!)

So here I am about a 30 minute drive east of Toronto’s suburbs on the north shore of Lake Ontario. We had a gorgeous stretch of weather a few weeks ago over our Thanksgiving weekend but since then (with the exception of a couple of hours on a couple of days) it has done nothing but rain with pretty much solid cloud cover. To whit:

cold front closing in

This one was taken while driving to work using my Samsung cellphone. The clouds looked to me like a wave breaking ashore.

Later on at work I got this one:

looking a little threatening

with the clouds glowering over the tops of a couple of the university buildings. But just so you don’t think it has all been like that forever and a day (tho some days it has seemed like that) we also get a few patches like this:

a sunny autumn day

 Just for good measure – last month I was visiting my son and his family in Calgary AB and I took this one as we neared Banff on a wee day trip.

Mountain, Sun, Cloud

Thanks Kel for the nudge. Enjoy folks – be back sooner than later next time. (p.s. – you’ll notice there is a ‘word cloud’ on the right sidebar. There are half a dozen other posts under ‘clouds’. Feel free to browse.) And check out other folks Skywatch contributions too: LINK

 

 Skywatch Friday

Might Be….

monochrome flare

Having a look at my schedule for the balance of the year and it’s unclear whether I’ll have another chance before years end to wish my blog-friends all best wishes for the holiday season and a happy, healthy New Year…. so consider it done. (Tho a little early.)

Many thanks to those who have sent messages of support to Lynda and I through very difficult times. It has been very important to us and much appreciated. Blessing to you and yours.

Shout Out

Just in case you haven’t already picked up on this via FB you should check this out for yourself. Blog pal Ron Dubin has a new enterprise that I’m enjoying – Radio WTH found here: http://www.radiowth.com/ Daily hour long compilations to enjoy whilst computing. 🙂

Ron’s photgraphy blog is already linked on my home page. He has individual prints and a couple of photography books for sale there. Good eye Ron. Good eye!

Words and Music

Music: Lately as I’ve been reading the daily papers (Toronto Star, National Post, NYT) I’ve been clipping items from the entertainment pages that contain ‘tinyurls’ which lead either to audio versions of songs or sometimes the opportunity to download them. Mostly I’ve remembered to hang onto them and when I have some time at the computer check them out. It did get me curious about tinyurls as I’ve really been out of the loop for a long time now and know nothing about them (God bless my tech challenged head.). Yesterday I came across a site strictly for songs and you can plug in a song title or artist / group and listen to it or share it via Twitter, Facebook or email. The main site is http://www.tinysong.com/ (We’ll see if it works here…. ahem, lemme see…) http://tinysong.com/rFWZ Ta-Dahhh!!!! This is the Johnny Cash song which accompanies ‘The Johnny Cash Project – an open source compilation of various artists works for an animated video of the song….. found here. (Be patient; it is large and takes a few seconds to load) http://www.thejohnnycashproject.com/. (Scroll down to watch the video.)

A few others – Neil Young’s new one ‘Walk With Me’ produced by Daniel Lanois. Scroll down to video screen. http://www.speakersincode.com/2010/09/jam-of-day-neil-young-walk-with-me.html

New one by The Cars – ‘Blue Tip’ http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=445115559565

The Decemberists – ‘The King is Dead’  video preview http://www.decemberists.com/

Tired Pony – The Place We Ran From – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sC68mAQYstE

(These are the pages which the tiny urls took me to.)

Words: So, since last time around I have read…

actually reread both Jeannette Walls ‘Glass Castles’ and Malachy McCourt’s ‘A Monk Swimming: a Memoir’.

A powerful memoir by David Sheff titled ‘Beautiful Boy: A Father’s Journey Through His Son’s Addiction’. I have his son’s book on hold at the library which covers the same ground from his point of view… Nic Sheff – ‘Tweak’.

Bill Bryson’s ‘Life and Times of the Thunderbolt Kid; a memoir’.  I have a couple of his others on hold too…. ‘A History of Nearly Everything’ and; ‘At Home’.

I don’t typically read many novels but I was glad I bought this one at the library’s sale, ‘The Secret Lives of Bees’ by Sue Monk Kidd. Beautifully written… transporting.

A collection of Shel Silverstein’s poetry called ‘Light in the Attic’ which was as entertaining for his illustrastions as his words. (Also bought at the sale – a steal at $2) On the same trip I found a tribute album of Shel’s songs performed posthumously by a variety of artists, including Kris Kristofferson, John Price, Nanci Griffith and Lucinda Williams. It is called ‘Twistable, Turnable Man- A Musical Tribute To The Songs Of Shel Silverstein’.

I’m currently reading a mystery by Harlan Coben which helps pass the time until I make it back to said library.

Other news – Cousin BJ and I will see one another at the end of the month for the first time in 2 to 3 years. The occasion is a celebration for her father (my late father’s eldest brother) who is turning 90 years young. So, barring any screw ups in my work schedule we should get some face time.

Other, other news – Looks like (same proviso) long time blog friend Kel and I may have a face-to-face meeting along toward New Years. She and her hubby are celebrating Xmas on this side of the Pacific and doing a bit of a road tour which will bring them past our front door. This is one of those ‘once in a lifetime opps’, so count me in.

Must get on with the day, accomplish something, have a nap and then off to work for the night. Bye.

State of Affairs

Shimmery When Wet

So…. thought I’d best check in here else folks’ll think I’ve gone AWOL or sumthin’. How am I? Well, somewhat better than I had been for quite awhile. Those last couple of months I was actively self-monitoring for signs of a return to clinical depression and some of the hallmarks were lurking about but seem to have been alieviated. Of course one of those signs is a lack of enjoyment or interest in things that you ordinarily DO enjoy partaking in… like blogging, for instance.

Truth be told I had considered (for a while there) deleting both blogs. One day last week I noticed someone had scanned some pages using ‘categories’ and when I began doing the same it illustrated to me that having written quite a lot here over the course of time I had made a significant investment here, touched on quite a variety of subjects, met a cool bunch of people and it’s all a source of joy for me.

Damn, just got interrupted with a call for work. Hmmmm…. Anyway, I had hoped to see cousin BJ tomorrow but that isn’t going to happen. See, our cousin G died and the graveside service is taking place in a town that is about equal distance for both of us. G is the first of our generation (well, who lived into adulthood) to depart this earth. G spent the last 30 or so years living in rooming houses, group homes, on the street, occasionally on psych wards,… you name it. G’s teenage experimentation with marijuana unleashed a latent schizophrenia that ruled the rest of his life. I didn’t know him at all well but feel for him and his parents just the same. God bless them all.

Tomorrow marks 6 years, 10 months sober for me. Monday will be 2,500 days. Just only sayin’ as it’s a fact and I’m not bragging mainly because drinking has crossed my mind on more than a few occasions during these last few months. Nothing like an educated alky to start rationalizing a return to drinking…. Sure, I can moderate, sure I can! Luckily I happened to be reviewing one of my pharmacology texts around that time and saw some stats in regard to what my chances were likely to be of being successful. A piddling 1 – 2% – I’m not that much of a gambler. So, I choose not to drink today.

Must go attend to some things – I’ll be back sooner than later. Ciao.

A Truly Unmerited Gift

….. and certainly a welcome, surprising one. Without divulging a great many details let me just say a certain long-time online friend singled me out for a wonderful gift; one which I am unlikely to be able to repay anytime soon. It will require some time, thought, effort, commitment and energy on my part in order to fully benefit from this gift. Without even having started to participate in it it has already begun to affect me – it’s really a ‘feel good’ place to be right now; connected, excited, anticipating the process, learning and growing… some creative stretching. Aaahhh!

What did I ever do to deserve such grace??

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I haven’t been around here much so you might be wondering what exactly I’ve been up to. Well, hours and hours spent at the computer drumming up new sites to search for work and covering off all my usual ones for updates. Normally 2 hours each morning and afternoon. Lots of running around town on errands – yesterday I ran into a few A.A. guys I know and spent a half hour visiting with them before carrying on with my day. I’ve been hitting some meeting places that I don’t normally go to or have never been to before.

I wrote awhile ago about the impacts of ongoing stress on health and associated perceptions regarding health. Turns out some of my imaginings weren’t phantom symptoms after all – I finally went to the Dr to get checked out and I have a pending referral for a specialist and some tests. AHA!! It wasn’t all in my mind like I thought.

totototototototototototototototototototototototototototototototototototo

At the local Goodwill shop I picked up a book that looked promising as it won the Giller Prize – Elizabeth Hay’s ‘Late Nights On Air’. I’m about 80 pages into it and thoroughly enjoying it.

Yesterday as I worked around the house I kept the music system cranking out a variety of music. I started out with Glenn Gould’s 1955 recording of J.S.Bach’s ‘Goldberg Variations’. I’m not really a big classical music fan but I feel like a dose of it every once in awhile. This is supposed to be the definitive recording of this peice.

From there I went to one I borrowed from the library – a compilation album from Allison Moorer’s career in country music. (AKA – Mrs. Steve Earle… now) A beautiful, talented singer / songwriter – good stuff.

Then it was on to George Harrison’s posthumous release ‘Brainwashed’. I love how the spirit of the man comes through in his recordings; especially on ‘Rising Sun’ and ‘Marwa Blues’.

From the soundtrack of ‘Cold Mountain’ I enjoyed a rich dose of bluegrass / early American music / and blues. If I had to pick a favorite it would be Alison Krauss’ haunting rendition of ‘The Scarlet Tide’; written by Elvis Costello and T-Bone Burnett.

… on and on it went…. the ‘Unplugged Collection’, some Jeff Beck, yadda, yadda…

Which reminds me…. Beck and Clapton are playing here in a couple of weeks and I will miss them due to financial constraints. Aaarrrggghhhh!!!! What a show to see; such a show to MISS!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Ej3BdMpgZw   for your aural enjoyment.

Anyway, must go and DO. Peace out.

Squeaking Under The Wire

-10C and Windy Tuesday Morning

With a few hours to go (9) until midnight I thought I’d throw up one additional post to end the year. I mis-titled this shot above – it was taken yesterday once a high pressure system had pushed the storm on it’s way east. I like the ramdom patterns the frost makes when it forms between the windows.

Yesterday's view from the kitchen door

A couple of inches of new snow freshens things up a bit.

how I've been feeling

more what I'm aiming for

radiance and silhouette

Backlit dancers…. that’s what I see.

Oh yeah… happy new year, again. It’s a’comin’. I think I’ll take in a meeting tonight and then visit my Mom for an hour or so, then come home to watch the ball drop. See ya.